Why Friendships Matter: Helping Children Feel They Belong at School

July 16, 2026

One of the biggest predictors of success at school is not academic success, but a sense of belonging and emotional wellbeing. While skills like literacy, numeracy and writing are important, the strongest influences on a child's engagement at school is the feeling of acceptance by their peers.


Children who feel more connected to and accepted by their peers, are more likely to participate in learning, develop confidence, regulate their emotions and enjoy coming to school each day.   


A growing body of educational psychology research supports this. A 2019 meta-analytic review in the Oxford Review of Education, which pooled findings across secondary school students, found that a stronger sense of school belonging is linked to better academic engagement, higher self-concept and self-efficacy, and lower rates of absence and dropout. Longitudinal research has gone further, following students from adolescence into adulthood and finding that school belonging in the teenage years predicts better mental health well beyond the school gates. The feeling of being valued by others gives children the confidence to take risks, ask for help and even recover from setbacks. 


Having worked in schools for many years, I have firsthand experienced that friendships are much more than children simply playing together. They provide opportunities to practise communication and problem solving, while also giving children an opportunity to show empathy, regulate their own emotions and help with conflict resolution when needed. These everyday interactions help children develop important life skills that extend well beyond the classroom. 


However, making and keeping friends is not as easy as it seems. It is even more difficult for neurodivergent children who are diagnosed with ASD, ADHD, anxiety, language delays and emotional regulation difficulties. These children also seek social connection and want to have friends who they can play with but lack the skills to do so. They find it difficult to communicate, join group activities, understand social cues, or find common topics of interest to talk to. Without the right support, these children can begin to feel isolated, misunderstood or disconnected from school. 


This isn't just anecdotal. Research reviews on children with neurodevelopmental differences consistently identify friendship as one of the hardest areas of social functioning for this group. It is also the one that is most closely tied to quality of life, mental health and academic achievement. There are many evidence-based programmes to build social skills for children and they have all shown measurable gains in friendship quality and peer interaction for children with ASD, ADHD and related profiles. The gains that children make during these social interactions hold up over time. 


The encouraging news is that social skills can be taught by modelling and practising overtime. Here are some simple ways in which parents and carers can support their children in making and keeping friendships at school:


  • Talk about friendships regularly. Instead of asking, "Did you make any friends today?", try questions like, "Who did you enjoy spending time with?" or "What is a fun thing you did with someone today?" These conversations help children reflect on the positive social interactions they had during the day. 
  • Practise social situations at home. Engage your child in role play at home. You can play out scenarios like introducing yourself, taking turns, or figuring out how to ask someone to play with you. Rehearsing these situations helps children feel more confident when they happen at school. 
  • Encourage shared interests. Encourage your child to build skills that come handy at school and can give them an opportunity to engage with others meaningfully. These include sports, music, coding clubs, art classes or community groups. 
  • Focus on one meaningful friendship. Children do not need lots of friends. Having even one trusted friend can significantly improve their sense of belonging and emotional wellbeing. 
  • Build emotional awareness. Helping children recognise and talk about their own emotions makes it easier for them to understand the feelings of others, respond with empathy and manage conflict. 
  • Work in partnership with the school. Teachers spend considerable time with children at school and often have valuable insights into their social interactions. Working in collaboration with them can help create opportunities for positive peer connections throughout the school day. 


It is also important to remember that friendships look different for every child. Some children enjoy large friendship groups, while others are happiest with one or two close friends. The goal is not to have the most friends but to have relationships where children feel accepted, respected and able to be themselves. 


Every child deserves to experience the feeling of belonging. When children know they are valued, included and connected, they are better placed to thrive, not only socially, but emotionally and academically. Social participation and relationship development is therefore such an important factor for predicting success in friendships and forming meaningful relationships later in life. 


If you would like support to help your child develop friendships, improve social confidence or strengthen their sense of belonging at school, you can book a consultation by speaking with your allocated Behaviour Support Practitioner or by emailing our team at contact@helpz.com.au. We would love to work alongside you and your child's school to create practical, meaningful strategies that support lasting success. 


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Disability Awareness Hub: Understanding Younger Onset Dementia

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Younger Onset Dementia When most people hear the word dementia , they often picture an older person experiencing memory difficulties. However, dementia can also affect people under the age of 65, a condition known as Younger Onset Dementia (YOD) . In Australia, thousands of people are living with younger onset dementia, and the number is expected to continue increasing over coming decades. A diagnosis of younger onset dementia can be particularly challenging because it often occurs during a busy stage of life. Individuals may still be working, raising children, managing mortgages, maintaining relationships, and actively participating in their communities. As a result, the impact extends beyond the individual to affect families, workplaces, and support networks. What Is Younger Onset Dementia? Younger onset dementia is not a specific type of dementia. Rather, it is a term used when symptoms of dementia develop before the age of 65. Like older onset dementia, it can result from various conditions, including Alzheimer's disease, vascular dementia, frontotemporal dementia, Lewy body dementia, and other neurological disorders. Interestingly, memory loss is not always the first sign. Depending on the type of dementia, changes in personality, behaviour, decision-making, communication, emotional regulation, or problem-solving skills may appear before noticeable memory difficulties. This can make obtaining an accurate diagnosis more complex, as symptoms are sometimes mistaken for stress, depression, burnout, or other mental health concerns. Fascinating Facts About Younger Onset Dementia Dementia Is Not a Normal Part of Ageing One of the most common misconceptions about dementia is that it is an inevitable part of getting older. In reality, dementia is caused by diseases affecting the brain and can occur at almost any age. 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Many individuals continue participating in hobbies, employment, social activities, community events, and meaningful relationships for years following diagnosis when appropriate supports are in place. Understanding Behaviours of Concern As dementia affects different areas of the brain, individuals may experience difficulties interpreting information, communicating needs, regulating emotions, or responding to environmental demands. Behaviours of concern often emerge when a person is attempting to communicate an unmet need, discomfort, confusion, fear, or frustration. Rather than viewing these behaviours as deliberate or challenging, it is often more helpful to ask: "What is this person trying to tell us?" Agitation and Restlessness Agitation may present as pacing, fidgeting, repeatedly moving around an environment, or appearing unsettled. These behaviours may be linked to pain, anxiety, fatigue, boredom, sensory overload, or changes in routine. Verbal Aggression Some individuals may yell, swear, accuse others, or become argumentative. Often, these responses occur when the person is confused, frightened, unable to express themselves effectively, or feeling misunderstood. Physical Aggression Physical aggression, such as hitting, pushing, kicking, or throwing objects, is frequently associated with a perception of threat or loss of control. The individual may be attempting to protect themselves from something they do not understand or are unable to process. Repetitive Questions and Behaviours Repeating questions or actions can be frustrating for caregivers, but these behaviours often reflect memory difficulties, anxiety, or a desire for reassurance. The behaviour may help the individual feel safe and oriented in their environment. Withdrawal and Loss of Motivation Not all behaviours of concern are outwardly disruptive. 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Supporting someone living with dementia means looking beyond their diagnosis or behaviour to understand their identity, experiences, relationships and unmet needs. In our article, Dementia Care: The Whole Person Is the Whole Point , we explore how a wellbeing-led approach can help us respond to distress with greater curiosity, compassion and respect. If you or someone you support is living with younger onset dementia and could benefit from person-centred Positive Behaviour Support, our team is here to help. Get in touch with helpz to discuss how we can support the person, their family and care team. 

Everyone Deserves to Belong

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How small, intentional actions can create more inclusive communities where everyone feels welcomed, valued and connected. Belonging is one of our most fundamental human needs. We all want to feel welcomed, valued, respected, and connected to the people and places around us. Yet for many people with disability, genuine inclusion can still be difficult to find. While awareness of disability has grown significantly in recent years, inclusion is about much more than simply opening the door. True inclusion means creating environments where people can actively participate, contribute, build relationships, and feel like they are a valued part of their community. At Helpz, we see every day how powerful belonging can be. Whether it's a student making friends at school, an adult joining a community group, or a person gaining confidence to participate in activities they enjoy, meaningful inclusion can have a positive impact on wellbeing, independence, and quality of life. Inclusion Starts with Small Actions The good news is that creating inclusive environments doesn't always require major changes. Often, the most meaningful improvements come from small, intentional actions that help people feel welcome and supported. Organisations can promote inclusion by: Using clear and accessible communication. Ensuring physical spaces are easy to navigate. Offering flexibility in how people participate. Creating opportunities for social connection and relationship-building. Asking people what support they need rather than making assumptions. Celebrating diversity and recognising individual strengths. These simple steps can make a significant difference to a person's experience and sense of belonging. Moving Beyond Accessibility Accessibility is essential, but belonging goes a step further. A wheelchair ramp may enable someone to enter a building, but belonging is about whether they feel included once they get inside. It's about being invited to participate, having a voice in decisions, being recognised for talents and contributions, and forming meaningful relationships. When organisations focus on belonging, they create environments where everyone has opportunities not just to attend, but to thrive. The Benefits of Inclusive Communities Inclusive organisations benefit everyone, not only people with disability. Diverse communities foster stronger relationships, encourage innovation, and create richer experiences for all members. When people with different backgrounds, abilities, and perspectives come together, communities become more connected, compassionate, and resilient. Looking Forward As we celebrate five years of Helpz, we are reminded that meaningful inclusion is a journey we all share. Every conversation, invitation, and act of understanding helps build communities where people feel seen, valued, and connected. Because at the heart of inclusion is a simple belief: everyone deserves the opportunity to belong. Creating a more inclusive world doesn't happen through grand gestures alone, it happens through everyday actions that ensure every person has the chance to participate, contribute, and thrive. Together, we can create communities where everyone feels they truly belong. A sense of belonging is especially important during childhood, shaping how children connect, participate and feel at school. In our artic le, Why Friendships Matter: Helping Children Feel They Belong at School , we explore how friendships and peer connection can support c hildren’s confidence, wellbeing and engagement in learning. At helpz, we work alongside individuals, families and support networks to create opportunities for greater participation, connection and independence. If you or someone you know could benefit from personalised support to feel more connected within their community, get in touch with our team.